Not logged in? Join one of the busiest Cancer Forums on the Internet! Join Now!   Latest blog post: Cancer Rates in September 11 Responders Rising

Advertisments:



Useful Links:

American Cancer Society
National Cancer Institute
Cancer Definition

Why are Cancer men so confusing?

Anything on your mind? Cancer and non-Cancer discussion in here

Why are Cancer men so confusing?

Postby fiacra49 » Wed Apr 18, 2012 8:24 pm

For a few weeks now I have bonded with a Cancer guy I go to school with. He asked me for my # because we have the same taste in music so I gave it to him not thinking much about it. A week later he starts texting me a lot. A lot became day and night everyday. He's so clingy...but I secretly liked it! So we finally hung out had one on one time. I did not like him like that. I thought he was cool and nice and I thought he felt the same. Well out of nowhere he tells me he likes me a lot and that talking to him has been driving him crazy because he just loves how we have so much in common. I was flattered but I told him i felt we were in 2 diferent phases in our lives...he's 19 going on 20 im 24 going on 25 but we get along so well. Sometimes i have to remind myself how old he really is. Well one thing led to another and we hooked up but afterwards he expressed some very deep deep issues that he was having and he said my presence was a ray of light and he was so happy to have me in his life. After that day I developed some feelings. so we continued to talk but i was being more flirtatious then on saturday he pulls a 180 on me telling me he thinks we should be friends and that sex messed things up to where it wouldnt be healthy to start a relationship but he still wants me to be part of his life and his "best friend"...he tells me this after I reveal to him that I like him and there could be a future if we just go with the flow. So I played it off like everything was cool and I was okay with being his friend but deep down inside I am PISSED!!! So our communication has been completely strained. I dont hit him up. He doesnt hit me up. When I saw him in class on monday he tried to act like everything was cool and friendly. I was only nice for so long because it was so awkward for me. He waited for me after class but I left because i was uncomfortable. What do I do?? What's wrong with him??

Virgo Sun
Libra moon/Venus
Gemini rising
fiacra49
 
Posts: 1043
Joined: Fri Apr 01, 2011 7:37 am

Why are Cancer men so confusing?

Postby kiba » Wed Apr 18, 2012 8:27 pm

Cancers are afraid of sex, and girls!
In astrology, these kinds of traps are everywhere.
Cancers are romantic and kind BUT they're immature and can't really fill a man's shoes in their relationship ambitions:)

HE REALLY MEANS IT! he wants to be with you but sex is scary to them. Even if you tell him you like him, he'll imagine possible, eventual nights where the heat's on and he'll freak out!

Maybe you need some kind of Libra, Virgo, Cappy or leo man but this guy wants you. He's just scared and needs time :)

I know Cancers. Ihave rising and Jupiter in it.
kiba
 
Posts: 1030
Joined: Fri Apr 01, 2011 1:19 am

Why are Cancer men so confusing?

Postby lothar88 » Wed Apr 18, 2012 8:32 pm

yes cancers are messed up.
lothar88
 
Posts: 1017
Joined: Thu Mar 31, 2011 7:03 pm

Why are Cancer men so confusing?

Postby carolos » Wed Apr 18, 2012 8:47 pm

As soon as I read that he began compulsively texting you and that you two hooked up...I knew this would not end well. And trust me, I've been there.
He should have been paced when he was sending all those texts. You should have told him to chill out/slow down or either ignore the texts. I have a feeling that when a guy in general sends a woman a billion texts, it is usually to rush right into getting laid. If they were interested, it would've been drawn it out and he would've gotten to know you first. He's using the friend line because he realizes he rushed. Cancer men are VERY emotional (unless their moon is in an air sign or touched by Saturn). His feelings are conflicted, and that's why he pulled the 180.


I honestly would avoid him until YOUR head is clear of the attachment after sex. But if you want to continue to be friends, you need to not sleep with him again. Cancers take a long time to "open up" about their feelings so he could be just clamming up. However, I do not see a relationship happening because this guy seems too unsure of himself, and because of this he could end up hurting you. No bueno. I say move on...unless you like roller-coaster rides that probably end up crashing eventually.

Edit: I deleted part of my post but I hope you read it and got it. This guy might not be as terrible as the Cancer I knew, but it started the exact same way as your situation. And he was ALSO inexperienced, so I just don't want the same thing to happen to you.
carolos
 
Posts: 1034
Joined: Sat Apr 02, 2011 8:11 am

Why are Cancer men so confusing?

Postby nixon87 » Wed Apr 18, 2012 8:51 pm

That's classic. Cancer is a Cardinal sign, an initiator, it gives them bravado. Sometimes that turns out to be a premature bravado, in a move which they were not ready to make. He felt love and acted on a feeling, just as he acted on a feeling when he was cutting things off with you.
What you could do is, not pose a threat to him.. Be understanding.. You don't have to rub your support in with so many words, they appreciate some quiet support as well.
It took awhile for a Cancer to once open up to me, and even then he still remained a bit open-closed. He had said many times that he wasn't ready for a relationship and I suppose that he wasn't, even though we were together off and on for three years. He was in a bad period and it seems as if he became more confident in his relationships further down the line..
You mentioned that your Cancer has some deep issues right now.. He is basically feeling vulnerable and wants to be friends.. Security is important to Cancer.
nixon87
 
Posts: 994
Joined: Sat Apr 02, 2011 5:13 am


Return to General Cancer Discussion

 


  • Related topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post