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My grandma is dying of cancer?

Pancreatic Cancer Discussions

My grandma is dying of cancer?

Postby davie » Wed Mar 13, 2013 5:24 pm

Let me start off by saying this woman isn't just a grandma to me. She practically raised me and I called her "mom" till I was thirteen, she is my best friend. Three days ago my family found out she is dying of stage 4 pancreatic cancer. She has had no symptoms at all, and her and I had only gone a week before to go skating.
I am so so lost, I am watching my entire family breaking down around me at the news and it is the hardest most devastating thing I've ever seen in my life. She has been given days to live and not one thing can be done since the cancer has wrapped it's self everywhere. My grandma is only 58.
My boyfriend left to BC today and I was supposed to be leaving with him before I found this news, so on top of losing my 'second mom' I won't see my boyfriend (my only rock in this right now) until May. I am crippling down under all this preassure, agony and sadness.
My grandma also suffered a stroke a day before the scans came back showing cancer, and she can no longer speak AT ALL. So she is sitting in a hospital bed dying and she can't speak to my uncle who she hasn't seen in seven years. My family is falling apart. My boyfriend is gone for now and I am all alone. I don't know what to do, I've never lost anyone before and I can't take all of this and it's only been a couple days since she's been hospitalized with all this.
Please, please someone tell me what to do, I'm so lost.
davie
 
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Joined: Thu Mar 31, 2011 6:12 am

My grandma is dying of cancer?

Postby eadwyn58 » Wed Mar 13, 2013 5:29 pm

I am sorry for what you are going through
but you will have to be strong for your family and grandma
Go visit your grandma and ask her to pray for you
She cannot talk ; but she can hear you very clearly
eadwyn58
 
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Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2012 11:18 pm

My grandma is dying of cancer?

Postby rowyn » Wed Mar 13, 2013 5:38 pm

Dying is part of life and you will be able to handle what comes your way. Take comfort in that knowledge. Just when we think we cannot possibly handle the pain of loosing someone we love, we realize that there is no choice. We must accept what is. I am so sorry that your beloved grandmother is sick and dying. Your boyfriend being away adds to the stress, but that cannot be helped. Even when all the worst is happening, life must go on. There is still work to be done, laundry to wash, bills to get paid, and trash to be taken to the curb. The most important thing is for you to be with your grandmother as much as you can. She needs your support. As a retired nurse, I can tell you that the sense of hearing is the very last sense to go. Your grandmother may not be able to respond to your voice, but she hears it and needs to hear it very badly. Sit with her, hold her hand, talk, sing, read, tell little jokes. Tell her about your day if you are working or going to school. Massage lotion into her hands and feet, brush her hair, and keep her lips moist with lip gloss. Bring in a CD player and play her favorite music for her. Make sure the rest of your family remembers that even though they are devastated by the impending loss of your grandmother, she is not dead yet. Make every moment she is alive count for her by giving her support.
rowyn
 
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Joined: Fri Apr 01, 2011 12:25 pm

My grandma is dying of cancer?

Postby napier36 » Wed Mar 13, 2013 5:45 pm

I am so, so, so sorry Sasha. I totally understand how you feel...I've lived this pain nearly my whole life with My Mom...With no doubt you must be having loads of void and sadness and feeling lost....I understand the thought of this loss is just....unbelievable. Their is nothing you have to do. The best thing you can do is just focus on expressing and letting your emotions be rather than trying to feel better - use your energy on allowing yourself to feel what you need to feel. You will eventually adapt to the situation honey - you will. Just let your emotions be - their is nothing you have to do. as your feelings take place, and as the days go by in this tragedy, things will start to settle. Hopefully you will discover strength in you that you've never knew you had...My heart goes out to you. I'm sure you will always find love. I'm sure you will find your path. I believe that you do have strength - I sense it in you Sasha. I wish I can give your heart a little comfort....a little warmth...a little security...I know you must lack a lot of it...a lot. I love your grandma too...and I feel very bad this is happening to her as well. I'm sure she's a very good woman....and their's probably so much more to say about her. This coldness you feel doesn't have to last forever Sasha.

here is my E-mail if you want
[email protected]
I may not have the best words to heal you, but I can understand everything your feeling, and listen to every word you say.

I love you Sasha - and I love your Grandma as well.
napier36
 
Posts: 447
Joined: Mon Jul 09, 2012 3:56 am


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