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Loosing A Child Advise?

Leukemia and blood cancer discussion.

Loosing A Child Advise?

Postby Atheistan » Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:40 am

A person who I consider my daughter has just had a great loss that has effected so many people, her 7 year old daughter passed away from acute lymphocytic leukemia two nights ago. I understand not much time has passed but she hasn't slept, she won't eat or drink she stays curled up in bed crying day and night not even her husband can get her to function. She blames herself saying she's a bad mom because she couldn't protect her baby and she's mad at God and the world for taking her daughter away and she wants it to be her instead of her daughter. I know I can't take away the pain but I would like to know what I could do to help it. I can't say I know where she's coming from because I've never had a kid. Nothing seems to work with her its like she has put herself away from the rest of the world.

Any condolences I'll make sure to tell her.
Atheistan
 
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Loosing A Child Advise?

Postby Sawyere » Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:45 am

i'd make her some sort of home cooked meal- plate of lasagna perhaps? something she likes. take it over with some flowers and a little note that says that you're there if she needs anything...if she's not eating maybe she'll eat something that she really likes...
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Loosing A Child Advise?

Postby lucius9 » Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:58 am

It's only natural for her to be mad at everything and everyone including God. The only thing that you can do is make sure that she knows that you're there for her. Let her know that there are still people that love and care about her..life is for the living. This is a terrible time for her and she feels as though she is a failure, reassure her that he child dying had nothing to do with whether she was a good or bad mother. When the Lord calls you home you have no choice. Help her to see the beauty that is around her and remind her that her child isn't in pain anymore. She should cherish the good times that she had with her child. Remind her of those times, every time she starts to focus on the negative, try to turn it into something positive.

I'm not sure how helpful this was. I hope that you're friend sees the beauty that is around her. And she will be in my prayers.
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Loosing A Child Advise?

Postby Emmanuil » Tue Oct 10, 2017 7:11 am

Theres nothing you can do..only time willl help, but never take it away completely. Losing a child is every mothers ABSOLUTE WORSE NIGHTMARE ever... as a mother myself, Id most likely jump off a bridge if that happened to my son. Im not even playing or exaggerating. its the worse of the worse of the worse..............

Perhaps if anything, just go hold her... you dont have to say anything, just be there... make her food... let her cry on your shoulder... nothing will make the pain any less, no matter what anyone does... but in time it will get a bit easier to exist... right now, her entire world is in ruins with no hope... its the saddest place anyone could ever be..
Emmanuil
 
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Loosing A Child Advise?

Postby ignazio48 » Tue Oct 10, 2017 7:23 am

Just be there for her if she needs you, but other than that, leave her alone.
She needs time to grieve.
A parent is not supposed to out live their children.
The hardest death on a person is the death of their child.
It has only been a couple of days, it may be months before she becomes totally functional again.
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